The Rambling Page

The Gift of Perspective
By Rabbi Yosef Koval

Last week, my father fell ill and had to be hospitalized for a few days. Thankfully, he recovered well enough to be released in time for Shabbat. Staying overnight to care for him, I hoped for some rest on a makeshift recliner, but a cacophony of hospital sounds and an uncomfortable chair ensured I barely slept.

Initially, I felt frustrated by my sleeplessness. Yet, as the night wore on, I gained perspective. I realized how fortunate I was—my greatest challenge in that moment was just a lack of sleep, while so many around me faced much heavier burdens. I silently thanked G-d for good health and the chance to honor my father, even at the cost of comfort.

This shift in focus brought a wave of gratitude. It reminded me how a change in perspective can turn frustration into appreciation for the blessings we often overlook.

Recently, I heard a story about Rabbi Yaakov Bender, a well-known educator. On a flight, he was seated next to a woman from Topeka, Kansas. She surprised him with detailed questions about Shabbat: Did his wife light candles in her best clothes? Did they dress up and eat festive meals, sing songs, share thoughts from the Bible? Rabbi Bender confirmed all her descriptions. Curious, he asked how she knew so much about Orthodox Jewish life.

She explained that years earlier, a Jewish neighbor had invited her to a Friday night meal. The experience was so uplifting that she sought more invitations. “You don’t realize how lucky you are,” she told the rabbi. “We have such experiences once or twice a year, if that. You get to celebrate every week.”

Her words struck Rabbi Bender: it took someone from outside his community to remind him of the beauty and privilege of Shabbat, something he, like many others, began to take for granted.

This theme echoes in the Torah. In this week’s portion, Bilaam, a notorious enemy of the Jewish people, is forced by G-d to bless rather than curse them. He declares, “How beautiful are your tents, O Jacob!”—words so meaningful that they became the opening prayer when entering the synagogue each morning. Of all the verses in the Torah, our sages chose the praise of an outsider for our daily prayers, perhaps to remind us not to grow complacent with our blessings.

It often takes an outsider’s perspective to open our eyes to the gifts we possess. Rather than become numb to the beauty of our traditions, let us remain mindful and grateful. By focusing on our blessings, both communal and personal, and not letting daily frustrations drag us down, we can live happier, more appreciative lives, and truly merit the blessings bestowed upon us.

Shabbat shalom,

Rabbi Yosef Koval